private sentimental time...

Not selfish, but people, sometimes in their fully loaded days, need a little personal time. A simple thing that makes us humans being. A little doings, which seemed restore all of our time that wasted. Some people get it, but some other do not even know. Stuck in a routine, pretending there's no need to do that. But yes, we do need it, pulled away for a moment from the busyness of the world. For a moment, just create our own world, to enjoy our own lives. Privately.

 Like I usually do. In my daily routine, which is, in odd moments, filled by tired, dizzy, confused, and upset, my necessity to unwind, take a break, make a deep breath were unbearable.Then, it's just like pressing the pause button, stopping my world, out of the path i am on for awhile.  And be alone. Alone but never feel lonely. Then I called it 'my private sentimental time'.

I have a list of sentimental things that I often do. 

- Listening to my favorite music, walking down the street, pretending that I'm walking in a foreign place.

- Reading a good book, eating chocolate, imagining that I am a part of the story.

- Watching movies in my room then daydreaming I am in a dramatic movie.

- Enjoying the wind blows with a cup of coffee and sentimental songs.

- Sitting on the roof of my house, seeing the sunset and little birds flying back to nest.

- Oh, and sleeping, certainly. ^_^

There're so much time when I imagine If I were in a different world. Being someone else, live a life I don't know what, in a place I don't know where, at the time I don't know when. I guess, it's a typical of the real sentimental person. But, believe or not, it simply liven up my life.

Music, novel, coffee, chocolate, dozens of imagination...

I am ready..

 Let's get it started!

The Picture of Me

That's me!

Based on Theresia Wijayanti's memory about me.

Coffee, Novel, Imagination. And a bunch of unspoken love.

Simply meaningful,  how I remain, stay in your heart.

Even though it would be hard for us to spend the day together anymore,

I do believe, nothing can remove me from your life. ^_^

Thank you bro, for drawing me beautifully.

You always be the best at understanding me.... 

Big hug...

18 hari pertama bulan september..

Ada secuil masa, tidak lebih saya suka jika dibandingkan dengan 85 hari berangin awal kemarau favorit saya yang datang sebelumnya, memang. Namun masa itu adalah sebuah langkah. Hanya berumur 18 hari, tetapi menggariskan kesan sekekal warna pelangi. Jika saya adalah perahu, maka itu adalah 18 hari dimana saya mulai mengurai gulungan layar, memantabkan haluan dan menanti angin tiba, menarik sauh lalu menolakkan diri dari dermaga. Menahan dan bertahan agar buritan tak karam karena lepas dari tempatnya bersandar. Kehilangan lalu sendirian di tengah gelombang. Berjumpa badai. Terdampar di himpunan cadas tanpa menara suar. Dan perlahan meniti lalu berjumpa tepi dermaga berikutnya.

18 hari itu saya belajar memaknai arti memulai dan mengakhiri, menangis dan tertawa, menggenggam dan melepaskan, berlari dan jalan di tempat, terjatuh dan mencoba bangkit, melewati tanjakan dan turunan, kehilangan dan menemukan, mempertahankan dan merelakan, menggeleng dan mengangguk, berteriak dan terdiam,berpelukan dan terpaksa menyudahinya. Bermimpi dan harus pergi.

18 hari hanya isi hati. Sebuah pernyataan akan ketidakmampuan diri untuk berucap, mengungkap semua emosi yang tak mungkin ditulis dengan denotasi tanpa permenungan setengah mati. Ini mengenai cerita tanpa suku kata, film dengan terjemahan tak terbaca. 18 hari ini hanya soal memahami.

Lalu tanpa tendensi, akhirnya 18 hari hanyalah penggalan-penggalan hidup dalam suatu rentangan waktu. 18 hari adalah hari berangin yang Tuhan sisakan untuk menguatkan hati. 18 hari adalah siang yang terik dengan sepetak awan gelap yang menipu. 18 hari adalah pagi mendung menjelang hujan tak berkesudahan. 18 hari adalah malam-malam dingin berbintang. 18 hari adalah senja pertama tanpa teman. Dan 18 hari adalah mimpi, terbangun lalu melangkah kembali.

yang sedang saya pertahankan untuk tidak keluar...

Tears are words the heart can't express (unknown)

random little things of remembering you

When I open my eyes, there's sweet sunshine

With the fresh aroma of fruits all around

With a full cup of mocha latte, I sit on this small terrace

And when I think of you

There's a sweet melody I hear
It reminds me of your smile
And unconsciously, all the feelings treasured inside me throughout the day
Come back to me again

We haven't asked each other if this is possible

If we can love like this

But, but who cares, like magic

I can't hide this feeling like I'm about to fly

Oh, day by day, day by day, my heart

 I'll fill it with love, like your heart too

Like a soft cream, let's look upon each other

Please think only of the good things

Even if at times, some things

May hurt my heart

If I just think of those wonderful memories of you

I can be happy

(Day by Day)

...and when the journey is true

Each time we say "Goodnight"

We'll thank the little star that shines

The second from the right....

..if it could be wrapped..

I wish I could wrap all of you guys, I'll keep and open it everytime I miss you.

Lucky, God is present in my life through you. I'm so thankful. 

No one could ever know me
No one could ever see me
Since you're the only one who knows what it's like to be me
Someone to face the day with
Make it through all the best with
Someone who always laughs at
Even when I'm at my worst, I'm best with you

(Rembrandts_I'll Be There For You)

When you're the best of friends

Sharing all that you discover

When that moment has past, will that friendship last?

Who can say? There's a way!

Oh I hope... I hope it never ends

'Cause you're the best of friends

(Fox And The Hound_Best Of Friends)

I believe in what we are

You will take me all the way, as day by day
Oh, you and me, hand in hand
To everywhere amazing
Be my friend, oh friend
We are forever friends

(Forever Friends_Fiona Fung)

 Were forever friends
Bond by love that time can't take away
Forever friends caring in a special kind of way
Heart to heart and hand in hand
We'll stand until the end
Loves forever when your forever friends

(Forever Friends_Sandi Patti)

Thank you so much, Lord, for giving me them...

diakhiri dengan indah...

Saat harus berkemas dan berhenti
kau harus tahu, ini bukan karena ketidakmampuanku menunggu.
Terpaksa bergerak dari labuhan, semata karena aku tak sanggup tenggelam.

Kau harus lihat, kuturunkan sekoci dari harapan yang karam,
memangkas layar-layar penantian, pergi dari kepercayaan.
Bukan karena aku menyerah,
hanya karena kau ternyata tak pernah sama.
Tak pernah sama seperti yang kuduga pernah ada.
Kompas hati menunjuk arah yang salah, karena kurasa bumi ingin aku belajar,
mengarungi samudera bertepi semu macam hatimu.
Ini bukan soal hati yang luka, bukan, tenang saja.
Hanya masalah pribadi antara logika dan harga diri.
Kau tak perlu memahami, tak pernah perlu.
Jika saatnya tiba, kelak kau akan mengerti,
ini hanya sebuah pembebasan diri yang terjerat mimpi.
Konfigurasi maya yang penuh ironi.
Aku perlu bangun, beranjak dari ketidakberdayaan menghadapimu.
Jadi, kubentangkan layar, berharap angin mengusaikan kait tak wajar yang menyatukan kita.
Lalu, sekociku bergerak perlahan menuju senja,
Kisah hari ini, diakhiri dengan indah...